Friday, July 15, 2005

Household Vernacular: A Rough Guide

In case you ever get called upon to babysit for us (PLEASE, come babysit for us!!!), here's a Hazel-speak to English translator. It will be updated as required.

Translation: Hazel's word for anything little, or small in stature. Can also refer to her kid-size table in the living room.
Usage: "Do you want a big piece of pizza or a peep peep one?" or "Please take your snack off the coffee table and put it on the peep peep."


Translation: Pajamas
Origin: Was introduced to Hazel by one of Mike's oldest and dearest friends, the wonderful Harry Bartelt, who Hazel was amazingly sweet on.

Harry: "Whatchya doin, Hazel? Putting your jim jams on?"
Hazel: "Jim jams!? JIM JAMS!!? He called the PJ's jim jams!!! HAHAHAHAAAAA!"

Evolved into "pa-jim-jams" sometime after Harry left.


Translation: A rubber duckie; any rubber duckie, whether it be one of the three in the bathtub, or the giant one in the window at Old Navy.
Usage: "Can we give the weebos a bath in the sink?" or "Let's go to the weebo store!"


Translation: Dog
Origin: Sort of convoluted. In a nutshell, the taquerias in SF list "shrimp" in the menus as "shrims." When Zoe curls up, head to paws, to go to sleep, she looks like a shrimp or "shrim."
Usage: "Look at the cute shrims in the car!" or "NO, Hosie, cookies are NOT for shrims!"


See also: Shrim
Alternatives: Hozo, Zozie, Shrimp Toast, Honaka San.
Translation: Zoe
Usage: "NO, Hosie, OFF!" or "I love you, Hosie."


Alternatives: Herbie, Sally, Jennifer, Zee.
Translation: Hazel herself. She has several alter-egos, most of which are characters from books she's read or DVDs she's seen. Can go from "Suzy" to "Sally" or "Herbie" without notice. Must be addressed accordingly.

Me: "Hazel, bath time."
Hazel/Suzy: "SUZY, bath time."
Me: "Oh, sorry. SUZY, bath time."
Hazel/Suzy: "Suzy doesn't take baths!"


Alternatives: Viley, Vilulah, Vilis, Baby-baby, Sister.
Translation: Violet
Usage: "Did Vi-loo poop again?"


Translation: Butt
Usage: "My biscuits are cold!" or "Can I have biscuits today?" (which requires it's own translation - "Can I go commando today?")


Blogger Timbo said...

Wonderful Ally. Im really enjoying this stuff.

10:17 PM  
Blogger Timbo said...

Bye the Bye,
One of my dear friend's sister is the current good witch on broadway.

10:22 PM  

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